I’m feeling a little alone out here in the PunditMom corner of the blogosphere as a Hillary Clinton supporter. I thought maybe I wasn’t perceiving reality correctly, but I learned this week that I have a firm grasp on the situation — we’re in hiding because we don’t want to be attacked by Barack Obama’s supporters.
There are plenty of things we can find to love or hate about the three remaining candidates for president. But one reason I keep seeing that so many people — so many women — vilify Hillary and shun her candidacy is because she stayed with Bill after Monica.
She forgave him, but we can’t forgive her for forgiving him. This week’s images of Eliot Spitzer’s wife standing next to him are going to bring all that Hillary/Bill/Monica stuff to the forefront again.
Personally, I would have kicked Bill Clinton’s behind out so fast he’d still be wondering what happened. But because of the perceived underlying current of political expediency, her decision rings false for many. That’s not a reason she can’t be President of the United States.
I don’t have to agree with her personal or political decision to stay married to # 42. I don’t even have to like or approve of how she navigates her marriage to think she can do a good job as President. It’s not my business.
If that’s the standard we’re going to apply, would Barack Obama face the same level of scrutiny if he had the same track record as Bill Clinton, and Michelle was still sticking around? Would he be taking the same sort of heat as Hillary? Somehow I doubt it.
There just seems to be a lingering, niggling something about Hillary’s decision to — yes — stand by her man that rubs a lot of women the wrong way and they’re holding it against her in her presidential bid.
Nobody seemed to give Jackie a hard time about Jack Kennedy’s “house guests.” He is still so revered, there have been countless suggestions that Obama inspires voters the way Kennedy inspired the nation almost 50 years ago. The only difference is that Hillary decided she was going to go for her own political future after the personal betrayal and embarrassment and not be kept down by the bad choices the Mr. made.
So for those who aren’t voting for Hillary because she didn’t send Bill packing over “that woman,” can we let it go, already?
Bill has moved on and has become quite the international ambassador. Monica has moved on — even the prestigious London School of Economics thought she was OK.
Hillary deserves for the rest of us to move on and experience what it’s like to live without Bill’s cheatin’ heart slapping her down one more time.
March 12th, 2008 at 2:38 pm
AMEN! (so to speak)
If she had left Bill standing at the podium, she would have been scolded for leaving a sitting presidnet for having a little fling… and I think the media would still be debating the definition of ‘intercourse’ to this day! It would be a hotter debate than wether Ross & Rachel “were on a break”!
How lame is it that more people vote based on their opinion of Hillary Clinton’s position when her husband ceated than on her positions on healthcare, civil rights, women’s rights, taxes, and the economy?!?!?!?!?
-Judy
(name changed to protect this Clinton supporter)
March 12th, 2008 at 2:44 pm
People hating her for her husband or what she should or shouldn’t have done just makes me nuts.
I’ve heard so many arguments about why people don’t like her, but my opinion is who gives a shit. She’s smart, articulate, and she knows what the hell she’s doing.
I don’t feel like I can say the latter about Obama as strongly as I can say it about her.
And I’m the FIRST person who said “WHY ARE YOU NOT LEAVING THAT ASSHOLE?” when the whole thing with Bill went down.
Why do we have to like her? Are we going to have tea with the president? Are we going to call them up and chit chat? NO. They’re running the country. Let them do that and I’ll save likeable for my friends.
(And a caveat — I actually find her likeable…)
March 12th, 2008 at 3:05 pm
Right on! (and I also find her likable and incredibly real.)
I know a lot of women who did not leave their husbands over infidelity and while I’m no fan of marriage in the first place I’m also not one to say all slime bag cheaters should be left immediately. What any of that has to do with her ability to be president is beyond me. I blame the patriarchy.
Rock on Hillary. Bit me Obama.
March 12th, 2008 at 3:25 pm
I used to wonder why she didn’t leave him with his pants down (bad joke), but her book explained it well. Actually, it explained a lot of things well.
I a an Obama supporter, but I could fairly easily support Hillary as well. I like his lack of experience. Do I think she would do a good job? Yes, but I also believe he will too. Anyway…
What I find ironic– the same people who disliker Clinton for being a hard-nosed bitch are the ones who want her to be a hard-nosed bitch to Bill. I don’t get that stance.
March 12th, 2008 at 4:51 pm
I never had to forgive Hillary for Monicagate. That is personal business as far as I am concerned. What I have trouble forgiving her for is Iraq. But I am a pretty soft-leaning Obama supporter. I just want a democrat!
March 12th, 2008 at 5:05 pm
That’s between the two of them, and has no bearing on her ability to do the job – or his, for that matter.
As I understand it, Hillary had plenty of opportunities to kick Bill to the curb before Monica, and if she didn’t, it may be because they had some sort of political “understanding” between them. I also suspect it’s not as cut-and-dried when your life is that public; I can tell you from experience that sometimes it isn’t in private, either, and unless you’ve been there, it’s hard to say what you’d do. And what you end up doing might not be what you thought you’d do; relationships are complicated critters.
The Spitzer situation is different for a couple of reasons, I think: the hypocrisy and apparent disconnect between public and private actions, and the illegality. (Like it or not, from a public perspective, breaking vows and breaking laws are different.)
Is this another example of how women are tougher on each other sometimes? I actually do like Hillary – always have – but her marriage shouldn’t be an issue in whether or not to support her.
(Sorry for getting a little long-winded here!)
March 12th, 2008 at 5:54 pm
Likability has nothing to do with it. I don’t care whether she left Bill Clinton or not. Actually, that’s not true. I admired her for choosing the harder road and trying to forge ahead with some kind of future. Chelsea is better for it, too, I’m sure.
None of this matters one bit to me. What matters is who I view as being trustworthy and having the best interests of our country at heart, and sadly, it’s not Hillary Clinton.
This isn’t a judgment I made lightly or with any personal animosity. It is a judgment I made after reading her books and then watching her over the past year.
Sometimes it’s not all about gender or anything so ridiculously obvious.
Hillary supporters shouldn’t be hiding. If you believe in your candidate, shout her praises. And while you’re at it, could you suggest that maybe she should make some rhetorical decisions that actually add to the national dialogue?
March 12th, 2008 at 9:46 pm
I’m a HIllary supporter because of her stance on policies, yes, because she’s a woman (forgive me if I’m ready for a president who would be more likely to place children on the agenda because she’s been a mother…let’s face it, being a mother gives you a perspective no man can ever have…but I digress), and because she has the MANY YEARS of experience that a president should have. No, she doesn’t have the showmanship and charisma that Obama has. SO WHAT? She has substance based on personal and political experience. Damn! That’s quite a package! If she was a man people would be falling all over themselves to vote for her!!
March 12th, 2008 at 11:01 pm
I don’t understand what kind of experience she has, other than becoming a senator in a state that was not her home while riding her husband’s coattails. I wouldn’t think Barbara Bush had the “experience” to be president. I just don’t get the 35 years. Or the “Day One.” Just because she knows some heads of state and her way around the White House?
I can’t get over her insistence on cheating in the primaries for Michigan and Florida. She’s a cheater just like GW Bush, and that is the LAST thing I want.
March 13th, 2008 at 2:39 am
I left a comment to this post over at Momocrats. It was pretty much along the lines of what has been written here in the comments.
Glad to have found you through Momocrats.
March 13th, 2008 at 6:16 pm
Personally, I admire her for believing her marriage was worth saving. I also admire many of her stances on issues.
What I, as a veteran, will never forgive Hillary Clinton for, is sending our soldiers, sailors, airmen, and Marines to war without a good reason… unless that reason is she thought it would make her more palatable to some voters, which makes it even worse.
Your husband cheats and you forgive him? Your business.
Being culpable in the unnecessary deaths of tens, maybe hundreds, of thousands of people? Unforgivable.
Apparently many American voters, most of whom who have never had to make any real sacrifice of their own safety for their country, are all too willing to ignore this because of gender issues.
Great.
March 13th, 2008 at 8:08 pm
All I can think is that the people who are so quick to not vote for Hillary because she stood by Bill are the same people who would say that they couldn’t vote for her if she’d left him because she didn’t honor marriage. These people just want something to complain about because they’re too afraid to admit that they don’t like powerful women.
March 13th, 2008 at 10:08 pm
Interesting analysis. Hatred is irrational, so when we rationalize it, every reason in the book seems flimsy. Hatred knows no reason. But you’re right about the hiding. The larger question is not why hate Hillary but why hate? We can see only too clearly what it produces.
March 15th, 2008 at 4:04 pm
I had a hard time making my decision when our Wisconsin primary came along. I went with my original gut feeling, and voted for Hillary Clinton. Since then, I’ve become even more certain that she is the most intelligent and most knowledgable (no, they’re not always the same) candidate. She is very qualified to be president.